I’m exaggerating a bit when I say I’m a liar. Essentially there will be times when I respond with a lie to someone’s inquiry about something superfluous.
Maybe they asked if I knew about some new musical artist or television show. If I know without a shadow of a doubt, that I’ve never heard about that artist or show, I will sometimes lie. I’ll say, “Oh yeah, I think I might have heard their song?” Or, “I did hear about the show but I don’t know much about it.”
I am lying. That is a LIE. I am knowingly distributing information that I know is untrue. Yes, it’s just a silly little comment about a television show or music artist. But it’s still a lie.
Honesty is one of my main values. But yet, I will lie in these situations. So if I am able to lie in these little moments, am I truly living my values? Am I immoral for lying about something so innocuous? Am I ethical?
Definitions
First, let’s understand the difference between values, morals, and ethics.
“Values are the foundation of an individual person’s ability to judge between right and wrong.”
https://www.yourdictionary.com/articles/ethics-morals-values-difference
According to this article from YourDictionary.com, there are specific differences between values, morals, and ethics. Values are basically a person’s foundational ideas that determine whether their actions are right or wrong.
As mentioned in this article, an example could be someone’s whose values are honesty versus someone who prioritizes achievement or success. In a situation where each individual is taking a test, the former will most likely not cheat on the test, whereas the latter in this scenario might think it is okay to cheat on the test if it means they will pass the test.
“Morals are specific and context-driven rules that govern a person’s desire to be good.”
https://www.yourdictionary.com/articles/ethics-morals-values-difference
So when we look at morals, it is tied to our values but it’s a little more complex. Morals are the combination of how “good” we want to be when concerning our values in a particular situation. I put quotations over good because being “good” is subjective to the choices we are able to make and the values we hold.
For example, let us look back on the situation of two people taking a test. One person’s values include honesty while the other person’s include achievement. What if the individual who values achievement also values integrity? They would most likely be in moral dilemma. This person would be battling to make a “good” decision while still following their values.
“Ethics dictate what practical behaviors are allowed, while morals reflect our intentions.”
https://www.yourdictionary.com/articles/ethics-morals-values-difference
In the article by YourDictionary.com, the author explains that ethics and morals are sometimes interchanged. Ethics are kind of like the rules that are followed in a society or an organization, whereas morals are more personal.
So the person who cheats on the test in order to follow their own value of achievement will be seen as morally sound by their own standard but will be seen as unethical by the test administrators (if they find evidence of the individual cheating).
Let’s go back to the beginning.
I say again to all that will listen: I am a liar! I value honesty, and I know what I’m doing when I answer someone with a lie.
But being honest is not my only value! I also value kindness, curiosity, and community to name a few. So yeah I lie to people about knowing the existence of a pop artist or new television show. I’m also giving someone the opportunity to pique my curiosity, to tell me about the community (or fandom) they participate with for the media, and I’m showing kindness by listening to someone talk about something they genuinely enjoy.
Am I a liar? Yeah, in these specific situations. But I’m not necessarily being immoral or unethical, not in my opinion. When the situation arises, of course I will be honest about the things that matter. However, I am still a liar and I’ve accepted that part of me.
Thanks for reading! Let me know your thoughts about my lying or if you think I am being dramatic.